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Parenting is often a stressful job. Juggling children's schedules,
carpools, activities and homework can wreak havoc in any home. If you have a
child with special needs, you may be adding therapy appointments, school
management issues, doctor appointments and more to the mix. You can easily
become worn out, over-stressed or even depressed. Since your child relies on
you, it is important for you to attend to staying healthy both physically and
emotionally. What follows are five simple, common sense steps to help you keep
yourself feeling confident and strong.
1. Seek out support. Don't wait until you are overwhelmed and struggling
to look for help. Find people who have children with similar special needs. You
will be surprised at how much help, support and information you may receive from
them. In your community, check with your school district to see if they offer a
Special Education Parent Teacher Association (SEPTA) or similar support group.
Even if other members have children with different needs than yours, you will
find many common topics to discuss. Check your library or the Internet for
national organizations that cover your child's disability. Often, they offer
support for parents through conventions, workshops and publications. There are
online groups and listserves (email discussion groups) that deal with virtually
every disability. People are only too willing to share their experiences and
offer advice, tips and resources. Support can come in many forms and help you in
ways you don't expect.
2. Take time out for yourself. Even if you feel pressed for time, you
need to carve out time to focus on yourself. Set aside your daily chores or work
for a little while. Take an hour once a day or even once a week and do something
just for you. Exercising, getting a manicure or visiting a local park or place
of interest can be refreshing and serve to renew your perspective. Don't put off
things you want to do until your child is older, or you feel he doesn't need you
as much. By fulfilling some of your needs, you will be happier and more able to
tackle issues that come your way.
3. Cultivate friendships. You and your child will both benefit if you
make an effort to meet and get to know your neighbors and their children. If
your child is in a special school rather than the local public school, this is
especially important. Friendships made outside the realm of your child's
educational environment can be especially rewarding for you, your child and the
other children as well. Children learn compassion and patience when they get to
know others not quite like them. By introducing yourself and your child around
your neighborhood, you will make some new friends and will not feel so isolated
from the community.
4. Follow your gut instincts. Always remember that you are the expert on
your child. No one knows him better than you do. If you feel that a doctor,
teacher or other professional does not understand your child's needs, find
another one. Just because someone has a degree or a reputation in a particular
field doesn't mean they are the right one for you or your child. The decisions
you make with your medical and other professionals can have long-term effects on
your child's life. Make sure you are comfortable with them.
5. Do your own research. Knowledge truly is power. Don't rely on the
"experts" to make decisions for you and your child. Think of yourself as a
member of your child's team. Find out what you can about all aspects of your
child's disability. Learn about the latest medical treatments and technology
available. Ask to meet people who have already experienced these. They will be
one of your best sources for information. Research the social and emotional
aspects of your child's disability. The earlier you are informed and the more
you know of pertinent information, the better off you and your child will be.
Parenting a child with special needs can be time-consuming and at times,
frustrating. Your personal needs should not be swept aside while your child is
growing up. Your frame of mind plays an important role in effective parenting
and decision-making. Keep these tips in mind so that you can feel content with
yourself and confident in your decisions. By following these steps, you and your
family will all reap the rewards.
Paula Rosenthal, J.D. is married and has
three children. Paula, her husband and daughter all have hearing loss. A
law school graduate, Paula has published HearingExchange.com, an online
blog and resource site for people with hearing loss, their families and
professionals since 2000. she is also a syndicated writer and a public
speaker on hearing loss, parenting and related issues. She and her
daughter were featured on “Back to the Hearing World,” a DVD directed by
academy Award nominee® Josh Aronson, for Cochlear Americas. It can be
viewed online at
http://www.cochlearamericas.com/Support/2109.asp
To contact Paula, send an email to
info@hearingexchange.com. |
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© 2000-2008 Paula Rosenthal and Taylor Rose, Inc. All rights reserved. For
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info@hearingexchange.com.
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